I don't know what to say to this...

[Roofus]

Found this while trolling around Encyclopedia Dramatica: (Also, not surprisingly, this is the same person who wrote that rapist checklist I posted a while back)

I have three sons, ages 16, 15, and 12. I was also in an abusive marriage for ten years in which my 15 year old was a frequent target of my x husband. These boys had a rough time of it, as did we all.

After I left my husband my children acted out for a short time, we all spoke of feeling relief and feeling safe yet there were still some rough spots as I got the hang of trying to do it alone.

Several years ago my accountability program found that the computer had been accessing pornography. Turns out it was my middle son. To date he has been 'caught' accessing pornography many times since then. He was 13 I think when this started.

I banned him from the computer, but after a few months I would allow him to be on it for short periods of time. Each and every single time my son would access pornography within days (and sometimes hours) of being allowed back online. He was aware that he would be caught because the computers are monitored but he chose to do it anyway.

Most recently my youngest son allowed my middle son to play with his PSP. Brandon (the middle child) used it to immediately access pornography online. The child is now banned from computers, video games and so forth. I've talked until I'm blue in the face, I've grown angry and yelled, I've cried when I was alone and when I was in front of him. I've had him read Dworkin, my site, and other places (namely OAG's site) and I still can't unseat this problem. He can recite feminist literature all day long, he can understand the tenets, the ideas behind it, how it links together but he will not allow this knowledge to stand in the way of his porn use.

I don't think I'm looking for advice (I've tried everything I could think of so far) but more a place to simply be sad. I can clearly see why he's looking at pornography, I've figured all that out readily enough, but I can't seem to make it stop.

I know, that as soon as my child leaves my home and moves into his own place that he will be looking at porn immediately. I know that I am raising a problem for women. I know that this child will one day grow and will fully absorb the messages that porn sends to men. I know that my child masturbates to degradation of my people (when I use that phrase I mean womyn) and that with every orgasm he will further solidify his own hatred of and superiority over, women.

I know that there will likely come a day where my son coerces a young woman into sex (rape) and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it. I look into the eyes of my son and they still sparkle like they did when he was a baby, but he's not a baby anymore, he's growing into a man and that man will have trained himself to degrade women before he leaves my home.

As a radical feminist who puts women first I cannot begin to determine what I should do with regards to this issue. My heart breaks because there is nothing I can do to protect the womyn he will come into contact with.

I have three boys. One of them is lost to me and as a mother and a radical womyn this breaks my heart in a way I can scarcely express. I don't know if it says something terrible about me, but you know what haunts me late at night? More than anything else? I know, in my heart of hearts that, knowing what I know now, if I had it to do over again I would have had that abortion.

I also find myself blaming myself over and over again, even though that radical womyn inside of me stands up and yells that I'm placing blame in the wrong place. I'm not sure what I intended to say with this message. I began writing it this morning and put it away again and finally decided to finish it this evening. I think that maybe I just wanted to share, I keep trying with Brandon and I keep failing. He simply doesn't care. When he wants to jerk off, everything goes right out the window.

It's not funny like the rapist checklist; it's really more horrifying than anything. THE KID IS 15 FUCKING YEARS OLD! OF COURSE HE MASTURBATES TO PORN! Anyway, this was a thread on a board that Anonymous took down as a direct result of the above post.

[DuffMan]

That is terrible, how can she call herself a mother that truly loves her child if she thinks about taking it all away, and wishing she would have. Jerking off is normal for 15 year old, stupid retarded bitch. I hope she gets AIDs and dies.

[DuffMan]

Oops

[mrandyk]

Yes every mother knows that someday their little boy will commit rape as well. I just find it hilarious she goes as far as calling sex rape, apparently under any circumstance.

[ThinkTank]

Porn exploits men too. And, yeah, just because the teenage kid rubs out over porn doesn't mean he's going to be a rapist. If it does, then I am looking at some serious jail time.

P.S. What is a "womyn"? She uses it as a plural and singular term. Is it a feminist thing or just a horrible spelling?

[Roofus]

P.S. What is a "womyn"? She uses it as a plural and singular term. Is it a feminist thing or just a horrible spelling?

A little of both.

[gRiMgRaVy014]

I'm 15, and I masturbate.

Not everyday, not always to porn, but I masturbate.

I don't think I'll become a rapist.

I'm not that desperate.

EDIT: It's weird that she uses both 'Women' and Womyn'. It's like she can't decide which to use.

[Skynet]

I'm 15, and I masturbate.

Not everyday, not always to porn, but I masturbate.

I don't think I'll become a rapist.

I'm not that desperate.

EDIT: It's weird that she uses both 'Women' and Womyn'. It's like she can't decide which to use.

It's not weird, she's a fucking fruit loop, that is all! I didn't read it all, just the beginning and the bold stuff. If she's saying she'd abort her kids because they have a wank every now and then she has issues!

[Specially Cork]

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

Is it the old "sex is an emotional connection between two lovers, not just something fun and enjoyable" routine? That whole way of thinking is getting pretty old now. Sex =/= Making love.

[melancholy]

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

The enjoyment has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter that she enjoys it, but the degradation part comes from how they have sex. Much of the sex in porn is displayed as a dominating male who leads the sexual acts and a female that is paid to take it and act like she enjoys it. A feminist would be appalled simply from knowing the guy paid a girl so he could treat her like a sex object, let alone the actual sex acts themselves.

At any rate, the woman that wrote this article has a right to be concerned about her son's porn watching habits. It's natural for a parent. But the extremes that she is taking it is more damaging to the boy than if he would just watch the porn. He's 15, of course he is going to want to see naked women. But to say that she wish she would have had an abortion because of it? That is so messed up that I cannot even find words to describe how absurd the entire notion is. "I wish I could have killed him since he won't stop looking at porn." Seriously, WTF?

[Roofus]

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

The enjoyment has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter that she enjoys it, but the degradation part comes from how they have sex. Much of the sex in porn is displayed as a dominating male who leads the sexual acts and a female that is paid to take it and act like she enjoys it. A feminist would be appalled simply from knowing the guy paid a girl so he could treat her like a sex object, let alone the actual sex acts themselves.

The women consented to be there. If she didn't want to have sex for a living, she would have chosen a different career path.

[melancholy]

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

The enjoyment has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter that she enjoys it, but the degradation part comes from how they have sex. Much of the sex in porn is displayed as a dominating male who leads the sexual acts and a female that is paid to take it and act like she enjoys it. A feminist would be appalled simply from knowing the guy paid a girl so he could treat her like a sex object, let alone the actual sex acts themselves.

The women consented to be there. If she didn't want to have sex for a living, she would have chosen a different career path.

Right, of course, I'm aware of that. I'm just trying to explain what I think feminists find wrong with it.

[Specially Cork]

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

The enjoyment has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter that she enjoys it, but the degradation part comes from how they have sex. Much of the sex in porn is displayed as a dominating male who leads the sexual acts and a female that is paid to take it and act like she enjoys it. A feminist would be appalled simply from knowing the guy paid a girl so he could treat her like a sex object, let alone the actual sex acts themselves.

See as far as I'm concenerned, if the woman is enjoying it, then that entire aspect is irrelevant. Besides, I've never once met a girl who doesn't expect the guy to take control in the bedroom

[not just souLLy now]

It's things like this that are going to make those kinds end up with sexual dysfunctions of one type or another when they're older- they're probably now under the impression that sex is bad and is something to feel shameful about.

[az_bont]

The woman had an abusive husband who frequently targetted that same son and, presumably, the mother.

If anything was likely to give him a sense that it is acceptable to use violence towards and/or degrade women, or just psychologicially fuck him up in general, I would think it would be that. If rubbing one out to a bit of blue on the internet every now and again turned teenagers into rapists, I think we'd have seen an explosion in the number of incidents of rape that not even the most radical feminist "womyn" could ignore.

[ace]

I know that my child masturbates to degradation of my people (when I use that phrase I mean womyn)

and that with every orgasm he will further solidify his own hatred of and superiority over, women.

I know that there will likely come a day where my son coerces a young woman into sex (rape) and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it. I look into the eyes of my son and they still sparkle like they did when he was a baby, but he's not a baby anymore, he's growing into a man and that man will have trained himself to degrade women before he leaves my home.

As a radical feminist who puts women first I cannot begin to determine what I should do with regards to this issue. My heart breaks because there is nothing I can do to protect the womyn he will come into contact with.

There's your problem. Feminists, you know, the REAL ones who started the feminist movement, wanted EQUALITY. Not SUPERIORITY.

I have three boys. One of them is lost to me and as a mother and a radical womyn this breaks my heart in a way I can scarcely express. I don't know if it says something terrible about me, but you know what haunts me late at night? More than anything else? I know, in my heart of hearts that, knowing what I know now, if I had it to do over again I would have had that abortion.

You think looking at porn on the internet and jerking off is fucking your kid up? How about the fact that his mother thinks he is a mistake and wishes he had been aborted?

I keep trying with Brandon and I keep failing. He simply doesn't care. When he wants to jerk off, everything goes right out the window.

Of course everything goes right out the window. He's fifteen and he has needs and desires that have to be met.

I'm 15, and I masturbate.

Not everyday, not always to porn, but I masturbate.

I don't think I'll become a rapist.

I'm not that desperate.

EDIT: It's weird that she uses both 'Women' and Womyn'. It's like she can't decide which to use.

Rape is usually an act of dominance rather than desire.

I've never understood this porn=degradation of women crap. In 95% of porn the woman is clearly enjoying herself. So what's the problem?

The enjoyment has nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter that she enjoys it, but the degradation part comes from how they have sex. Much of the sex in porn is displayed as a dominating male who leads the sexual acts and a female that is paid to take it and act like she enjoys it. A feminist would be appalled simply from knowing the guy paid a girl so he could treat her like a sex object, let alone the actual sex acts themselves.

Woman using their bodies to make money. Sounds pretty empowered to me. Of course, I know that most women make very poor salaries from porn (other than the super stars), so this argument really doesn't work.

I like porn. I don't like the porn industry. It's abusive to women, but then you can't blame the industry/executives. These women ARE aware of what they are doing. It's not like they are kidnapped and forced into indentured servitude (well, not usually).

[ace]

Fuck, and some of the things on that message board are JUST as fucked up.

***I don't know if it says something terrible about me, but you know what haunts me late at night? More than anything else? I know, in my heart of hearts that, knowing what I know now, if I had it to do over again I would have had that abortion.***

I don't think it says anything terrible about you. I find it curious that women always think that wishing their sons hadn't been born is "terrible", but from my point of view, terrible would be if you knew what you knew about him but *still* placed him and his existence over and above the lives and well-being of women.

THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. You are supposed to put your own child's existence over the well-being of a CAUSE.

[Roofus]

Fuck, and some of the things on that message board are JUST as fucked up.

***I don't know if it says something terrible about me, but you know what haunts me late at night? More than anything else? I know, in my heart of hearts that, knowing what I know now, if I had it to do over again I would have had that abortion.***

I don't think it says anything terrible about you. I find it curious that women always think that wishing their sons hadn't been born is "terrible", but from my point of view, terrible would be if you knew what you knew about him but *still* placed him and his existence over and above the lives and well-being of women.

THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. You are supposed to put your own child's existence over the well-being of a CAUSE.

How about "anonymom?"

Well do I know the guilt for not being strong enough to move heaven and earth and somehow counteract all of the negative forces that pulled my child away from the values he was brought up with. Well do i know the shame of knowing that our society blames his problems on me, blames me for not "fighting harder" for him. The fact is that the corrupt police in this town will not enforce my custody order and that the therapist I paid for out of pocket could only do so much. I have lost my Christopher and grieved for him just as surely as if he had died. In many ways he is dead to me.

But he is not and the way he treats his girlfriend, his sister, his grandmother, and myself make me hate myself for not pouring him down the sink at Planned Parenthood or grabbing a rusty coathanger and doing the job myself even if it killed me.

I was going to bold some stuff, but really, the whole thing should be bolded....

[ace]

Fuck, and some of the things on that message board are JUST as fucked up.

***I don't know if it says something terrible about me, but you know what haunts me late at night? More than anything else? I know, in my heart of hearts that, knowing what I know now, if I had it to do over again I would have had that abortion.***

I don't think it says anything terrible about you. I find it curious that women always think that wishing their sons hadn't been born is "terrible", but from my point of view, terrible would be if you knew what you knew about him but *still* placed him and his existence over and above the lives and well-being of women.

THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. You are supposed to put your own child's existence over the well-being of a CAUSE.

How about "anonymom?"

Well do I know the guilt for not being strong enough to move heaven and earth and somehow counteract all of the negative forces that pulled my child away from the values he was brought up with. Well do i know the shame of knowing that our society blames his problems on me, blames me for not "fighting harder" for him. The fact is that the corrupt police in this town will not enforce my custody order and that the therapist I paid for out of pocket could only do so much. I have lost my Christopher and grieved for him just as surely as if he had died. In many ways he is dead to me.

But he is not and the way he treats his girlfriend, his sister, his grandmother, and myself make me hate myself for not pouring him down the sink at Planned Parenthood or grabbing a rusty coathanger and doing the job myself even if it killed me.

I was going to bold some stuff, but really, the whole thing should be bolded....

Yeah, I was going to quote her, but I honestly couldn't think of a single thing to say.

[mankrip]

She's dangerous. Someone should find her kids and show this to them.