Dating co workers Bad idea or Good Idea?

RMD · Post by **RMD** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 10:35 am

bizzle · Post by **bizzle** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 10:42 am

Strapping Scherzo · Post by **Strapping Scherzo** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 10:48 am

Pretty bad. It's much easier to find a girl than it is to find a new job.

Post by **melancholy** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 10:52 am

Ask Pixel, he's had lots of experience on the subject.

perry · Post by **perry** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 10:52 am

Only if she lets you play Zelda after sex.

Veggita2099 · Post by **Veggita2099** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 11:23 am

I have done it before. Luckily she quit after we broke up. Actually she just moved away without even saying goodbye.

arrowhead · Post by **arrowhead** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 12:10 pm

dont do it

ace · Post by **ace** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 12:11 pm

RMD wrote:Dating co workers Bad idea or Good Idea?

Good in ways, bad in others. I've had my share of both.

For starters, it depends where you work. If you work in a corporate environment, it's usually bad. If your superiors, or even your subordinates catch wind, you could be labeled as unprofessional and have a glass ceiling erected above your head. Of course, if you work in different departments, and your dating this person will not affect either your her his/her work in any way, you probably don't have to worry. If however you work in a "part-time environment" (which I consider most retail, restaurant, fast food, etc jobs to be), it shouldn't be a problem.

Next, consider your definition of dating. Do you genuinely like this person and see yourself with her/him years down the line? If so, you can probably have a relationship that's out in the open that your co-workers. However, if you are looking for a casual, sexually based relationship, it's probably best NOT to blab to everyone about it.

Work relationships are good because there is lots of common ground, and you can use work time to further your relationship. It gives you a lot of time to spend with your significant other (though, you should really be working during work time.) I found it easier to trust people I worked with in relationships because a.) I saw them on a daily basis and b.) They had already earned my trust after working with me (and for me) for prolonged periods of time. Not to mention that having a quickie on your desk or in the back room is ALWAYS hot.

Work relationships can, however, also be very bad. It's easy to get the feeling that you spend too much time when you date a co-worker. You will see him/her every day you are at work in addition to the time you spend with him/her after work. If you are like me and you work every day, you will see the person you are dating on average 40+ hours a week. If you are a supervisor, manager, or have supervisory/management duties, don't even think of dating your subordinates - it can be seen as an abuse of your power or even sexual harassment.

In the event you break up with your co-worker, you will both be thrown into a potentially very awkward position. Hopefully not, but in many cases, a work-related break-up can foce one or both parties to leave their job(s). After a relationship with a co-worker has ended, one party (or both) may feel compelled to share secret information with other co-workers, much like they would do with friends after a break-up. Obviously, this is not a good idea and could get both parties in a LOT of trouble.

As you can see, there are both positive and negative points to dating co-workers. Although it may seem the negatives outweigh the positives, you have to remember that the negatives usually outweigh the positives in dating anyways, because of the potential for broken hearts.

If you do decide to date your co-worker, tread carefully. Consider what kind of relationship you want with them, whether your respective positions in the company you work for are equal, and whether you can weather the downfalls.

Whatever you decide, good luck. I've dated two co-workers before. One was a casual/sexual relationship that didn't really go anywhere because she was also involved with someone else, and they were becoming more serious. It didn't end badly, per se. But it certainly ended awkwardly. She wanted to continue on with me after commiting to the other fellow, and I didn't want to have any part of that. The other would have been a more serious relationship if I hadn't just been getting out of a previous relationship at the time. I was a little confused with what I was going to do with my life at the time, and so it didn't last. I'm always available in one capacity or another (irc, MSN, AIM, or forum PM) if you want to talk further.

RMD · Post by **RMD** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 12:41 pm

Ok, I work at ebgames and i'm a 3rd key which is like one step up above regular employ I really have no power. She's a adviser so pretty much just a part timer. Both of us are comitement type of people. Plus there seems to be good signs for it. 1 She dumped her bf of 1 year the day she met me. 2 She constantly flirt with me and we generally get along well. Plus she only works like 3 days a week and I only work with her 2 of those days.

ace · Post by **ace** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 1:17 pm

Have you asked her out yet, or are you working up to that?

It seems fine by my "rules", just always keep my negatives list in the back of your head, and good luck!

Post by **pixel** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 1:45 pm

melancholy wrote:Ask Pixel, he's had lots of experience on the subject.

:pounds head into wall:
Tell me about it. In my situation, it was a horrible idea. We were both absolutely wrong for each other. We had to see each other multiple times a week. She was a bitch and I didn't know any better.
In this situation, I agree with ace. It shouldn't be bad if you don't go lose your head. Just remember to talk everything out and keep your footing and it should be fine.

MulletMan13 · Post by **MulletMan13** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 2:36 pm

I've been in situations where it has turned out good, and where it has turned out bad.

Basically you have to see if you can stand her for extended amounts of time and does not annoy you... if you get annoyed by her after extended periods of time, you're effed.

RMD · Post by **RMD** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 3:01 pm

Well we work for 6 hr shifts at time with just the 2 of us so it works out fine. I think i'ma tell her to call out sick to work tomorrow night and take her out. Then get my manager to make her make up the shift she missed on the night that I close.

Ceeg · Post by **Ceeg** » Fri Feb 09, 2007 7:32 pm

This is definetly a topic i should have input, since im engaged to a co worker. We met back in 2001 and are reaching are 1 year anniversary of being engaged and September will be 3 years together. Yeah we got in trouble a couple of times, but things are cool now mainly cause she works the night shift and im a 1st shift manager.

My advice go ahead and go for it just make sure your main focus at work is work and not how fine her ass is.

SuperMegatron · Post by **SuperMegatron** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 12:29 pm

I am anti-dating of coworkers. I got a kid and something that required antibiotics from one.

butters · Post by **butters** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 1:14 pm

Hmm, interesting thoughts here. A girl who works across the hall in another dept. has been quasi-flirting lately. I don't even know what her name is....

ace · Post by **ace** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 1:57 pm

butters wrote:Hmm, interesting thoughts here. A girl who works across the hall in another dept. has been quasi-flirting lately. I don't even know what her name is....

Not a good start, butters.

butters · Post by **butters** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 2:23 pm

ace wrote:
butters wrote:Hmm, interesting thoughts here. A girl who works across the hall in another dept. has been quasi-flirting lately. I don't even know what her name is....
Not a good start, butters.

I'm not a names person, at all.

Dreamcast4life · Post by **Dreamcast4life** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 5:41 pm

Do what you want but I wouldn't advise it by any means.

bizzle · Post by **bizzle** » Sat Feb 10, 2007 7:10 pm

SuperMegatron wrote:I am anti-dating of coworkers. I got a kid and something that required antibiotics from one.

...

Dating co workers Bad idea or Good Idea?

Dating co workers Bad idea or Good Idea?

Re: Dating co workers Bad idea or Good Idea?