Lifetime Guarantee

[DCDayDreamer]

Death is closer than before you read this message.

[Specially Cork]

Ahhhh, you can't be so sure. The time I took reading and responding to this message has changed the chronology of the rest of my day - at least until I wake up tomorrow morning at 8AM which is the first time-sensitive thing I need to complete. On top of that, there's the time I spend thinking about this, which may very well extend tomorrow, because reading this could alter the outcome of certain events between now and then, including perhaps, the possibility of something killing me.

For example, maybe by crossing the street a minute later, I avoid a car accident. On the other hand, maybe I think about this thread tomorrow morning, forget something as a result, then have to return home only to be caught in an earthquake, dying in a building collapse I may have otherwise avoided.

The tiniest change could have drastic impact on the future, and your simple sentence may have profound consequences that go beyond your guarantee.

[|darc|]

Death is closer than before you read this message.

The humor in this post impacted my quality of life enough so that you extended my life by 3 days. Therefore, you are false.