That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

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That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Specially Cork »

BlogEmulation!

Good news - my wife got her settlement visa and we'll be coming back to the UK later next month as a family. It's been on the cards for ages but then we had a second child who set our plans back a while...and finally we've got everything sorted. China is no place for my kids. The schools are awful - and even if I sent them I'd have to pay out the ass for it because they charge non-Chinese citizens an extortionate amount. On top of that we'd like things like clean air, a garden, parks, peace and quiet, things to go and do at the weekends...stuff you just don't get here.

Bad news - I'm leaving China and coming back to a place I didn't like in 2007 and seems to have gotten worse since then (lol Brexit!). I'm giving up a job I love but am nowhere near qualified to do in the UK, and an affordable easygoing lifestyle I'll probably never have again. I feel like I'm sacrificing absolutely everything for the happiness of my kids, which is noble and the right thing to do but I feel like shit and wonder what the fuck I'm doing. Some of these kids I've taught for over 6 years and saying goodbye to them (forever) is going to be amazingly hard. Perhaps saying goodbye to this whole profession even more so. I have no idea what I want to do instead and neither have the money nor time to really retrain in anything.

So yeah, I'm constantly flipping between excitement and sadness and everyone's just expecting me to man up and get on with it. Easier said than done really.

Sorry for writing bollocks. This is the only place I still ever visit so thought I'd stick it here. Plus I remember posting about coming to China back in 2007 and thought I'd update whoever is left with the final chapter in this little adventure. My 20s have been a blast, but I'm 30 in 2 weeks and it's back to the real world I guess. :?
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Eviltaco64X »

You certainly picked an interesting time to move.

It's a heavy task. Best of luck seeing it through.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by RyoDC »

Boney, can you create some blog or post here where you describe your experience being in China with all it's peculiarities and interesting points?
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by not just souLLy now »

Don't do it. England is fucked. Burning rubble and empty cans of Stella.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by cube_b3 »

How about Canada?
It is really easy for Brits to immigrate there...
Think about it.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by JuddWack »

I can totally relate Boney! Where abouts will you be settling. Sent you a PM.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Specially Cork »

I'm almost certainly moving to London. Luckily, my wife's parents are somewhat wealthy and they're happy to spot us the rent until they're in a position to buy us a house. It's the only place in the UK that can give me that 'life in the big city' lifestyle I'm used to. If I don't have absolutely everything I need within 15 minutes of my house I'm going to struggle. My parents live in total suburbia and I hate it.

Job-wise I'm setting up my own business teaching English online. I've got over 300 Chinese parents on WeChat (Chinese Whatsapp) and can easily exploit this to generate business. Schools in China routinely charge up to £50/hour for tuition with a native English speaker, so it will be pretty easy to undercut this and earn some decent coin. Another option is to use business conferencing software and sell your time for peanuts but 'teach' loads of students at once. It sounds crazy, but the Chinese middle class piss away money on their child's education and it shouldn't be too hard to take advantage of. Plus I get to work from home.

Long-term there's no avoiding it - I want to work with children. I really enjoy it and I'm really good at it. I'm going to be joining Open University to get a degree in Early Childhood. I watched a video of men in Early Years education and realized it's exactly what I want to do. Plus there's a sizeable push by the government at the moment to fight against the social stigma of men working with young children and I'd like to support that.

My only issue is teacher pay is fucking shit. If my online thing takes off I might struggle to justify moving into that line of work.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by pixel »

Job idea: Create a YouTube series where you review Dreamcast homebrew.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Jeeba Jabba »

This is pretty exciting news, dude. It's obviously hard for you, but your children come first. The funny thing is, my wife and I did the same thing last year once we were expecting because of a horribly managed water supply (boil notices, brain eating amoeba, chemical intrusion into groundwater) and oil refineries... Except we moved 15 miles to the opposite side of the city. Not from China to England, but I'm obviously much braver than you, and more of a man than you'll ever be.

Also, I'm a housewife and spend all day every day with my son. He isn't talking yet, but I'm sure his first words will be along the lines of "You are a real man because you are here for me, and don't spend all of your time cheating on me with other kids like Mr. Dan."

Best of luck, and don't be shy to message me for any life advice.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Specially Cork »

Top post ^

I left work on Sunday. It's summer intensive now where the workload really ramps up. Seeing all the videos online I've realized I'm so happy not be doing it and I can finally enjoy a summer with my kids for once. It's just not a job that goes well with family life - we deliberately work when kids aren't at school (weekends, evenings, holidays) so I would never see my own.
Saying bye to some of the kids was difficult. I don't want to sound like a weirdo with that. We never rotated classes so while many students come and go, you can end up teaching some for years. Telling an 11-year-old that you've seen twice a week for more than half their life that you're moving half way round the world forever and will never see them again is really tough.

Got some trusted partners for my business who should be able to feed me a steady stream of students. Still worried about supporting my family on an unstable self-employed income but time will tell I guess.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by melancholy »

Man fuck this adulting thing. Seriously, when did we all grow up?
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Specially Cork »

Been back almost two weeks now. Overall I'm happy to be back. Great seeing my kids play outside even in my parent's garden and catching up on all the stuff I've missed out on like Netflix and whatnot. Even going to the supermarket...man. I was like a kid in a candy store. Sounds ridiculous but there's so much stuff I was either never able to get my hands on in China or it was just too expensive to be worth eating.

Downsides...It seems I may as well have been dead for the last decade. I'm 30 years old and I have no credit history at all. I checked with Experian and as far as they're concerned I don't exist. It's taken this long just to set up a bank account. The first problem was just getting enough documents together to satisfy ID and proof of residence requirements, then I basically had to be rejected for every line of credit before they could offer me their most basic of accounts.

Now I can finally start looking for a house to rent as I could finally transfer my savings across from China. I've already been informed I'll have to pay 6-12 months upfront because I'll fail all their credit and reference checks.

Next issue though is because of visa issues we've arrived later than we planned and missed the admissions deadline for schools. So he has to apply in-year, and that means he can only apply to schools that aren't full. The thing is, we can't find out which schools they are because it's done on a school-by-school basis and the're all closed for the summer. So we have to guess based on last year, then find homes to rent in those areas. It's a pain in the arse.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Matisfaction »

Interesting, my best friend keeps bugging me to move out to NanJing, I've been meaning to at least visit and people I know who have been to China say it's amazing but I've never really been totally convinced for some reason...
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Jeeba Jabba »

Specially Cork wrote:Been back almost two weeks now. Overall I'm happy to be back. Great seeing my kids play outside even in my parent's garden and catching up on all the stuff I've missed out on like Netflix and whatnot. Even going to the supermarket...man. I was like a kid in a candy store. Sounds ridiculous but there's so much stuff I was either never able to get my hands on in China or it was just too expensive to be worth eating.

Downsides...It seems I may as well have been dead for the last decade. I'm 30 years old and I have no credit history at all. I checked with Experian and as far as they're concerned I don't exist. It's taken this long just to set up a bank account. The first problem was just getting enough documents together to satisfy ID and proof of residence requirements, then I basically had to be rejected for every line of credit before they could offer me their most basic of accounts.

Now I can finally start looking for a house to rent as I could finally transfer my savings across from China. I've already been informed I'll have to pay 6-12 months upfront because I'll fail all their credit and reference checks.

Next issue though is because of visa issues we've arrived later than we planned and missed the admissions deadline for schools. So he has to apply in-year, and that means he can only apply to schools that aren't full. The thing is, we can't find out which schools they are because it's done on a school-by-school basis and the're all closed for the summer. So we have to guess based on last year, then find homes to rent in those areas. It's a pain in the arse.
Thanks for the update. All of that little shit will work out.

Out of curiosity, how does the citizenship/visa stuff work for Britons? What is the status of your wife and children, being that they were born in the PRC?
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by Specially Cork »

Jeeba Jabba wrote:Out of curiosity, how does the citizenship/visa stuff work for Britons? What is the status of your wife and children, being that they were born in the PRC?
Kids are really easy. All my children are British citizens by default. China can issue bi-lingual birth certificates so getting their passports was really simple.

My wife is here on a 2.5 year residence permit. After 2.5 years she can extend for another 2.5, then she can upgrade to staying forever, and if she wants she can take a test on UK life, make this pledge
"I, [name], swear by Almighty God that, on becoming a British Overseas citizen, I will be faithful and bear true allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second, Her Heirs and Successors according to law."
and upgrade to citizenship after that point. It's all a bit ridiculous but the argument is that if you've already got permanent residence, choosing to become a citizen is basically a ceremonial thing.
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Re: That's it...I'm coming back 'home'

Post by cube_b3 »

In the US Permanent Residents have to be on their best behavior. The smallest action can cause deportation and delay, someone I know moved houses, missed on a credit card payment or something it went to collection he was never informed. When it came time for naturalization he got deported cause they find the debt collection thing... He stayed in PK for 8 years. Got his PR card again and then did his 5 years and finally became a naturalized citizen only took him 26 years to become an American.
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Post by Specially Cork »

Alright, contracts signed and got the keys to a nice 3-bedroom house for the next year. I hate renting but we knew we'd have no choice for at least the first year. Mortgage lenders won't touch me for a while.

Had to buy absolutely everything from scratch too. All the furniture, appliances, etc. That's been expensive but fun. Hired a couple of Polish guys (our Mexicans) to help me do all the flatpack stuff on Monday.

Only pisser is gotta wait 2 weeks for internet because a whole new line needs to be put in.
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